Tuesday, May 3, 2011
The Smelly Fanny Awards
http://www.amazon.com/Universal-Studios-1978-Battlestar-Galactica/dp/1434895408/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1304451776&sr=1-2-catcorr
Without a doubt....NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel has been the most horrific movie / television corporation of all time in their handling of science fiction in general....the "Battlestar Galactica" property....and their management of the SyFy Channel.
I would like to begin a long overdue tradition of giving blunt credit...where blunt credit is due.....to a bunch of retarded imbeciles at NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel for their general all around incompetence in everything...and I mean everything....they do.
This is the first annual....."Smelly Fanny Awards." Awards that bring unwanted attention to the elite of the elite...of absolute incompetence....at NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel.....
I. Worst management ever....of a science fiction / media property.....NBC-Universal - "Battlestar Galactica."
2. Worst example of incompetence ever.....in hiring someone with no talent....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore."
3. Most notorious example of failing to grasp the essence of what science fiction is supposed to be....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Cannel."
4. Most notorious practitioner of hiring actors with no talent....NBC-Universal - "Edward James Olmos, Katee Sackhoff, Tricia Helfer, Mary McDonnell, Jamie Bamber, and Aaron Douglass."
5. The most incompetently run cable channel in history....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
6. The poorest qualified executives in history ever assigned to a cable network....NBC-Universal - "Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern."
7. The most notorious cable network repeatedly failing to grasp what its on-air identity is supposed to be...
NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
8. The poorest qualified and imagination deficient producer / writer in history....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore."
9. The poorest qualified and imagination deficient second in command.....NBC-Universal - "David Eick."
10. The lamest...the most highly derivative...the most boring as hell....and incredibly expendable programming ideas in broadcast and cable television history....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
11. The worst remake of a classic science fiction television series in history....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore's 'Battlestar Galactica.'"
12. The worst follow-up to the worst science fiction remake in history....NBC-Universal - "Caprica."
13. The worst follow / follow up to the worst science fiction remake in history....NBC-Universal - "Blood & Chrome."
14. The most notorious misuse of stealth marketing in history....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
15. The most notorious assemblage of no-talent hacks under one roof in broadcast history...NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
16. The worst weekly horror movies ever made....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
17. The most notorious example of being hypnotized by your own stealth marketing....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
18. The most long overdue mass corporate firings and lay-offs in broadcast / cable history....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
19. The most notorious example of on-air Schizophrenia ("Who the hell are we?")....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
20. The most notorious example of orchestrating the ruthless demolition of a cable network...NBC-Universal - "Bonnie Hammer."
21. The most notorious and clueless cable executive in history....NBC-Universal - "Mark Stern."
22. We don't hear from him much but he's still an idiot.....NBC-Universal - "David Howe."
23. Worst CGI special effects in history....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Monster Movies."
24. Worst acting in one-shot horror movies....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Monster Movies."
25. Worst on-air promotions....(This is a what network?)....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
26. Most inappropriate subject matter on an intended science fiction cable network.....Tie....NBC-Universal - "Marcel's Quantum Kitchen".....and.....NBC-Universal - "WWF Wrestling."
27. Most notorious practitioner of bleeding away every conceivable audience you can think of....from general audiences to science fiction fans.....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
28. They're so devoid of talent you won't see them working anywhere else....Tie....NBC-Universal - "Bonnie Hammer"....and......NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore."
29. The most notorious practitioner of failing to grasp what good drama is....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore."
30. The worst scriptwriting in horror movies....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Horror Movies."
31. The longest "Out to Lunch" a supposed creator has ever taken against his supposed creation (33 years and counting)....Glen A. Larson - "Battlestar Galactica."
32. The most poorly disguised stealth marketers who have made no bones about revealing who they really work for via their on-line behavior....Tie......NBC-Universal - "Russell Sanders"......and......NBC-Universal - "Jim Bennett."
33. Worst overall conception of television series in general.....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
34. Worst overall conception of made for television movies....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
35. Worst overall conception of a classic science fiction television series in a revamped format.....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore's 'Battlestar Galactica (GINO)' series."
36. Most notorious failure to grasp the essence of the science fiction genre....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
37. Most notorious failure to grasp the essence of the horror genre....NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
38. Most notorious inability to learn from its previous mistakes......NBC-Universal - "The SyFy Channel."
39. Most mean spirited and unsinspired remake of a classic movie....NBC-Universal - "Tin Man."
40. Worst television series remake of a classic science fiction character....NBC-Universal - "Flash Gordon."
41. Worst television movie remake of a classic superhero character....NBC-Universal - "The Phantom."
42. Worst title to a horror movie ever devised.....Tie......NBC-Universal - "Frankenfish" and NBC-Universal - "Sharktopus."
43. Worst makeup effects ever applied to actors....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Monster Movies."
44. Worst quality film stock ever utilized to film television movies....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Monster Movies."
45. Worst production values in weekly television movies....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Monster Movies."
46. Worst cinematography in weekly television movies.....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Monster Movies."
47. Worst casting of actors ever done in weekly television movies....NBC-Universal - "SyFy Channel's Weekly Monster Movies."
48. Worst production values in a weekly (rumored) science fiction television series....Tie....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore's 'Battlestar Galactica (GINO)'"......and.....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore's 'Caprica'."
49. Worst wardrobe conception and execution ever....in a weekly (rumored) science fiction television series....Tie....NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore's 'Battlestar Galactica (GINO)'".....and NBC-Universal - "Ronald D. Moore's 'Caprica'."
50. Most least likely anticipated and (rumored) science fiction television series...NBC-Universal - "Blood & Chrome."
The categories of course....will continue to grow....
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