Friday, March 11, 2011
Is There Any Stone Left Unturned In Ronald D. Moore's Supremely Boring Take on Battlestar Galactica That We Haven't Seen Already?
http://www.amazon.com/Caprica-Sucks-Channel-Misfires-Ronald/dp/1451556225/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1299864853&sr=1-1
There is nothing new in Ronald D. Moore's supremely boring (and sham) take on Battlestar Galactica that we haven't seen already. We've already seen it all in "GINO" and "Caprica." Dime store muck tends to be that way. The horizons of dime store muck are extremely limited, and its contents as well. Therefore, there is nothing new that SyFy Channel will be able to show us in "Blood & Chrome" that we haven't seen already in "GINO" and "Caprica."
1) Obvious location shooting in and around beautiful low budget Vancouver.
2) The endless wardrobe of bargain basement business suits, shirts, and neck ties from the "Ronald D. Moore Warehouse of Low Budget Wardrobe Tackiness."
3) Ronald D. Moore's dreaded (and ever revolving) pool of borderline passable actors he recruits to appear in his television series because he never can find actors of a better and higher quality. Yes, I'm speaking of Edward James Olmos, Mary McDonnell, Jamie Bamber, Katee Sackhoff, Lucy Lawless, Michelle Forbes, and Dean Stockwell.
4) The usual fracture in the overall premise of a Ronald D. Moore television series for the SyFy Channel we have come to expect. The incompatibility of futuristic outer space, spaceship sequences with people walking around in business suits during a bright sunny day in a suburban neighborhood. And this is an alien world so says Ronald D. Moore and the SyFy Channel. Of course, when Ronald D. Moore and the SyFy Channel tell you anything....you believe them!! When they try and sell you a tacky bag of goods that is obviously a tacky bag of goods...you ignore the overwhelming evidence that it is a tacky of goods.....and you believe them!! That's just how you get into the spirit of watching a Ronald D. Moore television series on the SyFy Channel....You ignore how bad it is....and cheer it!! You get into the mental frame of thought of being a...."kinder, gentler, Mystery Science Theater 3000 commentator."
5) The usual frowning.....mumbling.....staring blankly off into the distance....and sexual assault of one another we have come to expect from all of the characters of a Ronald D. Moore television series for the SyFy Channel we have come to expect.
We have seen all of this stuff before in "GINO" and "Caprica", and SyFy Channel is going to show it to all of us all over again in "Blood & Chrome." SyFy Channel is going to show it to us all over again because the SyFy Channel never has anything new to show us. When you have been as tacky and as versatile in the shoveling of dime store muck into the faces of the public as Ronald D. Moore and SyFy Channel have been, you don't begin changing your spots now. When you settle into your rut of not making money with the "Battlestar Galactica" property as Ronald D. Moore and SyFy Channel have, you're not about to change your bad habits now. Unless of course, new corporate mommy & daddy Comcast steps in and asks...."Gosh guys!! Why aren't you making any money over here at the SyFy Channel?"
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