Monday, January 17, 2011

The Battlestar Galactica Conspiracy

In Hollywood (the movie and television industry), you dump a project faster than a sack of hot potatos if it doesn't perform up to financial expectations. In essence, there is a "one strike and you're out policy" in the movie and television industry. Not so with NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel (the Twilight Zone of eccentricity within the movie and television industry.) NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel has been failing quite phenomenally and spectacularly in their endless regurgitated nonsense otherwise known as their "Sham interpretation of the 'Battlestar Galactica' property. They initially failed already with Ronald D. Moore's first, sham interpretation of the "Battlestar Galactica" property infamously known as "GINO" (Galactica in Name Only.) You know the series, right? Where Edward James Olmos and Mary McDonnell spent all four low rated reasons frowning and mumbling at one another, and NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel tried to (and failed to) market it as "high concept drama." After failing with this series, NBC-Universal /SyFy Channel moved on to producing "Caprica", their low rated and recently cancelled spin-off series to their low rated (and cancelled) "GINO" series. Two failures in a row would prompt everyone else in Hollywood to be fanning out pink slips left and right to all of the perpetrators involved. Not NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel (the Twilight Zone of Hollywood) where failure is embraced and displayed as a mark of pride, like a wart or a boil on one's ass.

To the surprise of no one (given their unprecedented, eccentric behavior of the past, NBC-Universal / SyFy Channel is moving ahead with yet another (inevitably low rated) spin-off series of a recently cancelled (low rated) spin-off series - "Caprica" - which was a spin-off of the low-rated (and embarrassing "GINO" series.)
"Blood & Chrome" is the latest (doomed to fail) sham interpretation of the "Battlestar Galactica" property soon to roll off the NBC-U / SyFy Channel asembly line of doomed Ronald D. Moore productions born to wait in the wings of cancellation as it plays out its 13 episode first season. David Howe and Mark Stern are the two SyFy Channel execs who green-lit yet another low rated flop of a series based upon Ronald D. Moore's sham interpretation of the "Battlestar Galactica" universe. There is no doubt that failure has become so second nature to these two idiots at the SyFy Channel, that it has now become habitual to the two of them to continue to do so.

Those who are naive enough to be looking forward to the low rated debut of "Blood & Chrome" will also be too naive to realize that "Blood & Chrome" will contain the exact same formula woven into its dysfunctional infrastructure which led to the cancellations of both "Caprica" and "GINO." Mainly, that "Blood & Chrome" will be yet another poorly written soap opera poorly disguised as a Science Fiction / Space Fantasy / Battlestar Galactica television program with a shaky premise virtually impossible to define, with laughably low budget production values, actors from the Canadian Screen Actors Guild with shaky acting talents, ho-hum CGI effects, and a style of storytelling that is so remedially handicapped, that it ends up alienating the small fraction of the viewing audience "Blood & Chrome" (if at all) manages to attract.

"Blood & Chrome" will fail because David Howe and Mark Stern are not talented executives. (They proved this when both "Caprica" and "GINO" failed.) SyFy Channel is not a talented basic cable network, and the "above and below the line personnel" physically charged with making "Blood & Chrome" are not talented either. Not only that, but they will also make the same mistakes in the production process that they did when they were making "Caprica" and "GINO." The same mistakes which led to the cancellations of "GINO" and "Caprica." (1) A poorly conceived, sham interpretation of the "Battlestar Galactica" property (2) laughable production values (3) poor storytelling (4) characters you don't give two shits about (5) more business suits and shirts & ties from the "Ronald D. Moore Warehouse of Low Budget Wardrobe Clothing" and (5) an evident contempt for the "1978 Battlestar Galactica" series.

Am I wrong? Has SyFy Channel "ever not repeated the same mistakes in the past and expected different results? Nope!!

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