Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Oh Goody. In It's Quest For Marginal Ratings At The Very Least, SyFy Channel Is Now Broadcasting "Hostel Part 2"
Let's see now. Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern have failed at everything else they have tried to do at the SyFy Channel. They failed at re-imagining "Battlestar Galactica" for the 21st Century. They have failed at making weekly monster movies anyone would take seriously. They have failed at branding the SyFy Channel with a discernable...on-air identity of any sort. They have put such garbage on the air as WWF Wrestling and a weekly cooking show. What's left for Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern to do in order to try and drum up advertising revenue for the SyFy Channel...when everything else they have done has failed?
Well...they might as well try the "Torture Porn" scene as made notoriously known by Eli Roth. The broadcast of "Hostel 2" on the SyFy Channel tonight proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that this cable network is not only run by psychotic imbeciles totally devoid of morality, but it is also a cable network so hungry for advertising revenue that they are now resorting to the disturbing freak show of human torture to try and drum up advertising revenue. I'm assuming (and this is a real long shot) that Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern have loved ones that they come home to every night after their usual work day of decimating the SyFy Channel with their collective...patented bad taste in television programming. Perhaps they come home to spouses...nieces...nephews....brothers....sisters....parents...their own children. They come home and face these loved ones of theirs after putting such vile trash on the air as..."Hostel Part 2." This movie immediately places Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern in the disturbing category of..."being unworthy to be in the same room as their loved ones."
The thing I can't figure out is...why did the SyFy Channel even bother to purchase "Hostel Part 2" for broadcast when the entire global population can just watch the movie in its entirety on http://www.youtube.com/? Without commercial breaks and those majestically irritating SyFy Channel promos and bumpers.
The broadcast of "Hostel Part 2" also proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that as far as cable networks go, the SyFy Channel is as thoroughly broken and as thoroughly dysfunctional as a cable network can get. It is humanly impossible for any cable network to get anymore broken and dysfunctional as the SyFy Channel has become. I beg Comcast to take a corporate wrecking ball to the SyFy Channel right away, and immediately serve Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern their pink slips and walking papers. Gut this thoroughly useless and disgusting cable channel once and for all.
Posted by Languatron at 9:36 AM