Sunday, November 4, 2012

Deciphering All Too Familiar Phrases In a Typical "Bryan Singer Press Release" And Revealing What They Really Mean

quote - "Thank you, 20th Century Fox, for sparing us fans the long, arduous, drawn-out process of finding a new director for X-Men: Days of Future Past after Matthew Vaughn left the production last week. Are there better directors out there for this project? Possibly. Some might even say definitely, but we'd rather the issue be settled, thank you very much, than risk opening the field of candidates up to Brett Ratner again.
Yes, Bryan Singer has returned to the director's chair of the franchise that he spawned in the first place. His early films have problems, but put it in perspective: Singer was defining the superhero movie genre long before there were tons of examples of how to do it right. There were bound to be missteps (toads getting hit by lightning, Storm's hair, the first interpretation of Sabretooth), but Singer dared to take the comic book characters seriously, and his efforts paid off. Sure enough, the moment he left the series, and Brett Ratner took over, the whole thing fell apart into the usual mish-mash of nonsensical plotlines and pointless action sequences. And sure enough, when he came back as a producer on X-Men: First Class, the franchise became a bastion of quality once again.
Deadline is reporting that Bryan Singer's contract is a done deal, implying that the production of the newest X-Men film, which would seem to adapt the classic comic book storyline about a mutant going back in time to prevent a tragedy that leads to the genocide of their species, will continue without much delay. The film is expected to be released on July 18. 2014. - "unquote"

1. "Bryan Singer has returned to the director's chair."

Translation: Bryan Singer has not returned to the director's chair.

2. "Bryan Singer's contract is a done deal."

Translation: Bryan Singer's contract is not a done deal. No contract was ever signed.

3. (This movie) "will continue without much delay."

Translation: Every barricade and obstacle imaginable will be cooked up by Bryan Singer to steer this movie straight into "Development Hell" during the course of the next year.

4. "The film is expected to be released on July 18th, 2014."

Translation: This film will never be made or released by Bryan Singer. In the fall of 2013, when Bryan Singer feels that sufficient time has passed fading this press release from everyone's memory, he will announce yet another movie he will never direct. If "Days of Future Past" is made at all, Bryan Singer will not be the director.

"The Official Bryan Singer List of Abandoned Productions (Volume 1)"

Movies and television productions Bryan Singer claimed to be taking on as a director in press releases. Nothing ever came of these productions.

1. Six Billion Dollar Man
2. Battlestar Galactica

3. The Munsters (TV series)
4. Logan's Run
5. Excalibur
6. Bob Fosse mini series (HBO)
7. 2012
8. Sellevision
9. X-Men: Last Stand
10. Jack The Giant Killer
11. Star Trek
12. The Prisoner
13. Wolverine 2
14. X-Men 3
15. Aim High
16. X-Men: First Class
17. X-Men: Days of Future Past (Abandonment Pending)
18. Freedom Formula: Ghost of The Wasteland

There's just a whole bunch of abandoned "X-Men" movies in this list, isn't there?

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