...is because it's a cry for help from the three of them to the civilized world to have pity (sympathy) on them for having zero imagination and piss-poor taste in running the currently decimated Science Fiction channel (thanks to them) into the ground they never had a clue in how to manage in the first place.
How long did it take Hammer and her minions to think up this astonishingly ludicrous idea for a television movie? Three minutes?
I suspect the way Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern think up these stupid ass ideas for horror movies is a form of...."Verbal Plot Progression." The three of them sit in Hammer's office chowing down on pizza and "Slurpee Big Gulps." It probably goes something like this....
Bonnie Hammer: "Paul Bunyon."
David Howe: "The Jolly Green Giant."
Mark Stern: "Not so jolly."
Bonnie Hammer: "An Axe."
David Howe: "Victims"
Mark Stern: "The woods."
Bonnie Hammer: "Crappy CGI"
David Howe: "Fake blood"
Bonnie Hammer: "We have a movie!!"
Similar in principle to this cute little sketch from "The Electric Company." How the SyFy Channel comes up with its ideas for its horror movies. Didn't Bonnie Hammer used to be a programmer for children's television? Hmmmmmmm?
Read the books Universal Studios has tried and failed to censor on Amazon.com...
And read these books at another location where Universal Studios executives and its stealth marketers won't be able to post negative, misleading (stealth marketed) reviews of the books via them purchasing candy and Rogaine Foam on Amazon.com (allowing them access to the Amazon book review section) and not actually buying and reading the books. I'll leave the other 150 global locations under wraps for now.