Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Why The SyFy Channel Has Never Been Taken Seriously As a Business And Likely Never Will


Identity -

What is the identity of the SyFy Channel? What is it? Perhaps the best way to try and define what the hell the SyFy Channel is...is to eliminate what it isn't. It is not a Science Fiction Channel. It is not a Horror Channel. It is not a Wrestling Network. It is not a Cooking Channel. Yet it has elements of all of these things in its eccentric makeup. And all of these things in its makeup have been extremely...poorly done...by Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern.

The best ballpark approximation of what the SyFy Channel is...is that it's a Smorgasbord Schizophrenia Channel. It tries to be all personalities...to all different types of people....from all different walks of life...and still isn't making any money because of it. It is also a "nameless...anonymous....John Doe platform" for Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern to experiment with...in order to try and capture a portion of the children's television network...the wrestling market...the cooking show market...and any other market they want to take a stab at...and inevitably fail while doing so.

Interviews -

Has Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern ever not given a cringe worthy interview? These people shouldn't be managing a cable channel, they should be gathering marketing data for A.C. Nielsen. The three of them are intellectually incapable of conceiving a simple premise for a television series...simply. What they do instead...is try and front load a potential idea for a television series...with all of their marketing desires to capture the following markets....Children's Programming....Wrestling Programming....Cooking Programming...Horror Programming...and Schlock Programming. No wonder the SyFy Channel has been and forever shall be...an ill-defined nightmare of a cable channel. In every interview the three of these idiots give...they announce non-verbally to the entire world....that they are not qualified to run this cable channel.

Lack of Talent -

The lack of talent at the SyFy Channel doesn't end with Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern. It also generously extends to all of their underlings as well...

1. The idiots who conceive their weekly monster movies.
2. The idiots who produce, write, and direct their weekly monster movies.
3. The idiots who conceive and work on all of their weekly television series.

A Failure to Admit Faults and Course Correct -

Admitting faults and course correcting away from those faults is not in the psychological DNA of Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern. They stick with television producers who have repeatedly failed them in the past (Ronald D. Moore)...their failed programming ("GINO"..."Caprica"..."Blood & Chrome"), and keep them within arms distance reach if they want more programming from them. In all honesty, how on Earth would Ronald D. Moore ever support himself if he didn't have his corporate mommy and daddy (SyFy Channel) to fall back on in between his other projects that keep failing? (His "Harry Potter: C.S.I." project. His "Thing" remake script. His "Wild, Wild West" remake script. His "Virtuosity" project.)

Not Forking Over More Money to Hire Better Talent -

It goes on and on with the SyFy Channel, doesn't it? The endless stream of no talent hacks working for them in the producing, writing, and directing categories is....notoriously known. Whether it be with their weekly television series or their weekly monster movies. The obvious solution to this problem is...fork over more money and hire better talent. Not in the corporate and psychological DNA of Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern.

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