Wednesday, June 1, 2011
This Article Confirms Our Worst Fears That The SyFy Channel is Run By Crazy People
Just what I've always wanted to see on a cable channel that is supposed to deliver Science Fiction programming. Smelly, sweaty men prancing around in spandex instead. According to Bonnie Hammer and David Howe....this is what I want to see. I thank the two of them for making my mind up for me without asking for my permission first.
Years ago, there was a character in the Superman comic books called "Bizarro." He came from a parallel Earth that was the exact opposite of ours. The actual shape of his world was a square instead of a circle. The people of his world did the exact opposite of everything we did. They strove for unhappiness, frowned to show contentment (right up Edward James Olmos' alley)....and laughed to show sorrow.
I now know that this "Bizarro World" is not some imaginary place. It exists....it's real.....and it's in the here and now. It's....The SyFy Channel. The SyFy Channel exists and functions on an alternate plane of existence where their rules for doing business are the exact opposite of everyone elses. They cancel popular television programs ("Farscape", "Stargate"), renew low rated and unpopular television programs ("GINO", "Caprica", and inevitably...."Blood & Chrome")....they cheer and brag about it everytime they get low ratings, they can't attract reputable advertisers for the life of them, and the one woman 99% responsible for destroying the former and glorious "Sci-Fi Channel" (Bonnie Hammer).....received a promotion because of it. Let us not forget that the SyFy Channel keeps repeating the same mistakes again and again in television programming that repeatedly lands them in the ratings sewer.
This is "The Bizarro World"......straight out of the comic book.
Now let's get to the fun part. Let's discuss just how crazy Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern really are. We're not talking mere craziness here. We're talking craziness on the level of Michelle Bachmann and Sarah Palin craziness. Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern came to the SyFy Channel with an extreme phobia of "Geeks." This is no mere phobia among the three of them. This has been a debilitating mental disorder among the three of them that prompted them to destroy the former Sci-Fi Channel.....out of their irrational fear.....of "Geeks."
Listen to any one of them give an interview. They just can't get through the interview without mentioning "Geeks" at least once. It's always "Geeks" this....and "Geeks" that. As if the three of them either individually or collectively had previous traumatic experiences dealing with "Geeks." Perhaps at a Glen A. Larson family picnic and horse shoe toss. The first step in conquering any phobia is to admit that you have one. Which is what Bonnie Hammer, David Howe, and Mark Stern need to do.
Posted by Languatron at 12:14 PM